Queen of Wands: King of Fail

Hello, and welcome to another edition of "Webcomics and their Failings!"

Today we are going to review a pretty well known webcomic known as The Queen of Wands.

I referenced this comic earlier when I was reviewing Kate Beaton: The Goddess of Webcomics to exemplify a comic that might have good writing but had god awful art. Of course, I never gave QoW a chance now did I? The art was so off putting that I decided I didn't want to give it the time of day but didn't want to criticize that which I was uncertain about. So I read it and I'm sorry to say I was...really really disappointed.

I am a fan of Punch N' Pie because this is the rare Slice of Life comic that is actually interesting as it is very story driven and twenty/thirty somethings like myself easily relate to it. Believe it or not, the same person wrote both but only illustrated Queen of Wands which perplexes me as PnP is funny and interesting and QoW is anything but.

1. Writing

Sigh....Aeire must have been using QoW as practice for PnP although it's difficult to see much similarity. Typically a 4 panel comic, it often included the "nothing" panel. A panel in which nothing happens or there is a pause. The "nothing" panel is unnecessary I know the purpose of this is for effect, but the same could be done in a three panel comic with far more substance and far less unnecessary exposition to set it up; it would've been much better had it only been 3 panels. Panel 1 for exposition, panel 2 for the climax and panel 3 for the punchline. However she has Panels 1+2 for exposition, making the second panel unnecessary. This adds for a bulky and boring read.

In addition to the needless panels, the writing just isn't that funny, the punchlines are lame or otherwise nonexistent. Sometimes, less is more Aeire. Many of the comics would be funnier with a bit less explanation or reaction afterwards. It has also been realised that this comic started off with punchline in mind, and then switched to drama. Comedy and then drama. Hmm...I think I have stated before that it's always a bad idea to start off with one type of comic and then end with another because then you get the readers going "Uh....I didn't sign up for this" because they didn't and you are giving them something they don't want. That being said, it's possible it switched to that because she wanted to go in a different direction with the characters. If this was the case, it would have been better to END the comic section that was humorous and start it again with the same characters, but with a different genre in mind.

2. Art

Ugh

Ugh

UGH

Bad bad BAD art. Probably one of the worst artists I have seen. Colors are flat and painful to look at, characters are rough and not in a good way. Everyones' profile looks like badly drawn animu. with the face on depiction of eyes looking very similar to the profile of eyes. I'm pretty sure most of this was done in Photoshop, and not well. Lines are too thick, the hair looks like its a heavy lump of colored clay on each of the characters heads and sharp at that. Ugh...hurts my eyes. Bad..ew..

3. Lame

Something that I want to touch into here is how the author made her character clearly more beautiful and attractive than all the others. All the other women have plain hair and drab colors whereas her characters coloring is vibrant and attractive with long lashes and luscious red hair. Give me a fucking break. It's obvious you think you're hot shit but let me tell YOU something howabout: You're not.
All around, the comic is just lame. I kind of see where the better writing picked up towards the end, and then she went on to make Punch N' Pie which was much better.


More things that make this webcomic fail:
Poor structure
Boring
Immature writing
TEH COLORS OMG

Grade? D

Slice Of Life: Slit My Wrists

As a wise boyfriend once said to me, "Yeah, I went to a panel with [Jennie Breeden (from The Devil's Panties)] and while her comic sucks she did give some really good advice: 1. Put at least 4 years into a webcomic for it to succeed 2. Be consistent and 3. Update frequently." Thanks a lot Ian, you insinuated that not only will my blog probably fail (4 years...what?!) but that I am inconsistent and don't update frequently. Luckily this isn't a webcomic, it's a blog! Ruleseses dn't aplie to me liek speling or gramer or updatn.

I tell you what though, after some thought, I realize that boy is RIGHT. While I am NOT a webcomic I should still be consistent! I made a post, waited a couple weeks, then did two in one week back to back. I'm going to try a schedule of updating at least every month. I might do more than that if there is a) a demand (unlikely) or b) I find a webcomic that I need to disparage right away (far more likely).

Slice of my Own Life! I'm interesting....right?

Something that has been picking up speed in the webcomic world like a speeding locomotive that needs to crash into the proverbial brick wall are "slice of my own life" comics. These comics are based on the genre of comic known as "slice of life"
"slice of life" : A comic based on the life of a real person, most likely the creators of the comic.
"slice of my own life": A comic about the life of the creator.
Those are the basic definitions of the two variants. The "slice of life" category of comics make the comics unique because the characters are only based on real people, which gives the creator(s) the freedom to alter reality as they see fit to make it more entertaining or special from other webcomics of the same genre. The "slice of my own life" comics are purely autobiographical. A "slice of life" comic usually starts out as a "slice of my own life" comic because it is "safe". The creator(s) already know the people they are putting into the comic which are usually them with different names (sometimes). What makes these comics different is that as they get the hang of things (i.e. making a webcomic), they make it more interesting by bending reality and it becomes a "slice of life" comic which in turn usually means it will be successful in some form or fashion.
Comics that start and stay "Slice of my own life" are boring. This is because the creators think that everyone will think they are interesting, and they won't have to do any creative work because people will just love love love the comic because it's on the internet and they can get famous for just being them.

Alas, some "slice of my own life" comics think they are "slice of life" comics. Example: No one is going to by that there is a robot in the future who has serious girl problems and bad halitosis. Everyone will know it is you. You are boring and sad. Adding the bells and whistles of an altered reality doesn't make up for the fact that your character is based on a real person (can't relate + complicated = boring!) and therefore has character limitations. No one wants to read about you going through blah school with your blah friends doing blah blah blah and then waking up the next day and doing the same thing becuase it's boring and no one can relate to something so specific as your particular school with your particular friends doing something specific in specific places.

Advice

How to make a pure "slice of life" comic:

1. WHAT A GREAT CAST! THEY'RE JUST LIKE ME AND MY FRIENDS *ADDS TO FAVORITES*
Make your characters believable, but not TOO believable.
Emphasize a characters physicality, personality and especially a grace or flaw.
Examples:
Fiona is beautiful and slender (physical) frequently nice (personality), however SHE NEVER BATHES (flaw!).
Brad is big and fat (physical) generally grumpy and irritable (personality), but has a secret love of unicorns (grace!).
Go with this basic formula to create characters that seem "real" but not "too real".

2. I don't like you very much, therefore I'm going to stop reading your comic *CLICKS ON X*.
Don't make characters "too real".
Characters that are "too real" probably "are real" and the readers know this. Don't treat your readers like they are idiots. No one is going to buy that a robot has girl problems and halitosis.
Generalizations of people (archetypes) are what allows the reader to relate to characters. It makes the characters interesting because they are general enough for readers to relate to rather than a person with "too many" qualities. The more specific you are about a person or character and the more complicated they seem, the less people relate because it becomes more apparent that the character is not, in fact a character, but a real person.

3. Soooo...there are sentient robots that look like people? How come we never see one?!I don't like unexplained references very much, therefore I'm going to stop reading your comic *CLICKS ON X*.
Does your world have talking cars and flying chairs? Then please elaborate. Don't leave out the world! The world is something that is never ever "too" detailed. That is something you should be at liberty to be creative about. Is your world this world? Then explain or show where they live so that your readers have an idea of where to push the pin in in a map. Or if you want to be general about where they live so it's as if the characters could live down the street from the reader, don't forget to get them outside to show this. In short: Don't forget the environment!

4. It WAS about Tina and Skylar getting married and moving to Chicago, but now it's about Dave and Jason fighting crime. I don't like Dave or Jason very much, and I don't care about them fighting crime therefore I'm going to stop reading your comic *CLICKS ON X*.
What's it going to be about? Video games? Relationships? Art? Pick a general theme and stick to it! You can add more sub themes as you choose If you deviate from the original theme, you will lose your audience.

These are just basic rules to go by. Don't forget a varied group dynamic and good dialogue. Dialogue and character interactions are what a "Slice of life" comic is all about.

The bottom line of this post is this: Don't do a "slice of life" comic. You'll try to do it but it'll probably end up being "slice of my own life". There are too many out there trying to be Penny Arcade (video games) or XKCD (math/relationships) or Questionable Content (indie bands) ect. Do something origional! Fill in a niche that hasn't been filled or that doesn't get a lot of attention. If you do happen to do a "slice of life" make it fresh, make it interesting, and above all, make it unique.

TOMORROW!

A REAL REVIEW I PINKY SWEAR!

The Devil's Panties: Mystery and Mediocrity

Getting in to stride here, I will try to post a review T- TH just like different comics! Although I don't think I'll ever run out of webcomics to discuss, I may come back time and again to certain ones to point out the strengths and weaknesses as well as improvements, declines and advances.

Today I am posting about The Devil's Panties as seen here.

The reason for the title of the entry is mostly because this webcomic manages to baffle me in many ways. It has good art and bad writing, appreciation for readers unless they try to help. I see this creator at almost every con I go to on the eastern seaboard but don't know anyone who likes this comic. I do not understand these dichotomies. ON TO THE REVIEW! WHOOSH!

1. Writing

It's lackluster at best. I haven't even laughed one time at any of the jokes because they're just plain not funny. This is another case of an artists talent absolutely wasted. She's not the best artist I've seen but she's definitely good. It doesn't matter though because the writing doesn't make you want to stick around and find out how good because it's, well, lame. Some of it is lame because the punchline and art don't match.
Here is an example of what I mean about not matching.I guess the character was laughing? Squealing? Joyously about to sneeze? I am also confident she did this just to have 4 panels.
It's a little too boring for my taste, and not funny enough to warrant reading further.

2. Art

As boring and humorless as her writing is, her art is pretty good. I don't object to the posts of the figures she drew in class when she was in art school, as I am a big fan of charcoal renderings.
I also appreciate the black and white scale with an occasional color going on. It's creative and original. She should illustrate and someone else should write. That'd make for a GREAT comic.

3. Uh...what?

"yes I fucking know I can't spell. Do you think that it could POSSIBLY have escaped my notice after 12 YEARS of special education, resource classes, and private tutors?! because if it did then the CONSTANT reminder and LIFE LONG ridicule SURE AS HELL keeps me fucking awair!! "

So what you're saying is that everyone needs to accept that you can't spell yet you decide to pursue a livelihood by illustrating and writing a webcomic. Heaven forbid you get someone to check your work.
It was #3 that really cinched it for me. I might have spent more time on this webcomic but I was completely turned off by this immature and venomous rant. If she, Jennie Breeden, can't take the time to click on spell check or get someone to review her writing, then I can't take the time to read her webcomic, decent art or no. It would be in her best interest to take the "spelling!" rant down if she wants to get new readership and respect.


Other things that make this webcomic meh:
Many inside jokes
Situations without context
Unrelatable even if you're into 'the scene'
Mediocre writing

Final Grade? C- to D

I can't decide between C- and D because I think one of the worst things you can do besides having a terrible comic is to lash out at your fan base. It shows not only a lack of maturity but a lack of appreciation. It's pretty disgusting and unprofessional.

POSTPONE YOUR SUICIDE TILL AFTER MY NEWEST POST PLEASE!